hepausedinhisstride,fightingtheurgetogobak.heouldn’tgobak,hereallyouldn’t.hedoubtedprofessormgonagallwasstillup,butthepossibilitythatdraoalledherdownwastoogreat.notthathispresenewouldhangeanything.hewouldeathisownshoesifhewasn’tonthetrainbaktoking’scrossattheendofthesummer.hemukeditup.butdidn’thealways.

heresumedhiswalkofshamebaktowardshisorridors.hewouldbeginpakingtonight.hedidn’tknowwherehewouldgo.well,baktogrimmauldpe,obviously,buthedidn’tknowwhathewoulddo.thehope,orratherthefantasy,thatdraohadwantedhim,eveninasmallway,hadreallybeenoneoftheonlythoughtshehadtakensoeinshewar.andnow…andnowheknewthatdrao,aliveandwell-well,aliveandbreathingandbetterthandead,ifnotexatlywell—wantedhimbutwouldn’thavehim.orwantedhim,butnotenough.orhadwantedhim,atsomepoint,butdidn’tanymore.

hemarvelledatthefatthatitdidn’tmakehimfenybetter,toknowthatinsomepeandtimeofdraomalfoy’slife,hehadfeltsomethingforharry.buthesupposedthatwasbeausetheknowledgemadeallofhisimaginedlossesreal.theawkwardfirstfewmealstheywouldhavesharedafterthewar,bothworriedthattheotherwasjustgoingthroughthemotionsofbeingiviltohelpmovealongthepost-warunitymovement.thefirstfewautioustouhesthatwouldleadthembothtooverthink,beausesurely,surelyhehadn’tmeant—buthadhe?andwhentheyrealizedthattheotherhadmeantit,thentheywouldbefaingalltherebuildingtheyhadtodo,personally,globally,togetherinsteadofseparatelyandsoinrediblyalone.andmaybethey’dhavefought,sreamedateahotheruntiltheywerehoarse,thrownthings,madeanabsolutetipofgrimmauldpewiththesmallwarstheywagedeverynight,whihwaswhateveryonewouldhaveexpeted.butmaybetheywouldhavebeenhappy.harrylikedtothinkthey’dhavebeenhappy.

butd

本章尚未读完,请点击下一页继续阅读---->>>